I struggle.

I struggle to live within the will of God every moment of the day.

I struggle to remain calm when things don’t go the way I want them to.

I struggle to keep my mouth shut and not to say anything when someone does a stupid thing in front of me.

I struggle to keep my blood from boiling

I struggle to remain soft and to calmly help someone right when they did something wrong.

And when I step into the hole and do and say things that should rather not have been said or done, I feel bad.

I wish I could simply bite off my tongue or keep it locked up at least. Why do these things keep happening? I feel bad and I wonder whether I have the Holy Spirit inside me. To a great extent I can identify with Paul when he says that he really wants to do what is right, but before he knows it he is doing the wrong thing.

It’s sort of comforting to know that the big guys also struggled. We’re in good company. Then we have to pray hard with Paul: 16I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength …

Ah! We need reinforcements. We cannot deal with this on our own. It’s bad to say it, but it’s true. It’s in our nature to strain towards sin and on our own we can’t stand firm. Now I no longer feel so bad about struggling.

But that doesn’t give me the right to let it go. We can never become complacent about things we do wrong. On the contrary! We must try our best to make it right. We must give the Holy Spirit more space in our lives. We must allow the power of the Holy Spirit to be released inside us, because then we won’t struggle every day to live within the will of God.

We won’t struggle to remain calm when things don’t go the way we want them to.

We won’t struggle to keep our mouths shut and not say anything when someone does something stupid in front of us.

We won’t struggle to keep our blood temperature low.

We will be soft.

That is what the powerful power of the Holy Spirit does inside us.

Scripture

Ephesians 3:14-21

Reflection

What are you struggling with?

Can you do it on your own?

How should you allow space for the work of the Holy Spirit?

Prayer

O Holy Spirit, I need You so. I cannot do it my own. Please come and live inside me and release your power in me. Together we won’t struggle. Amen