Do you wonder what jealousy really means? The Collins Dictionary defines it as:

… the feeling of anger or bitterness which someone has when they think that another person is trying to take a lover or friend, or a possession, away from them.

Wikipedia says:

Jealousy generally refers to the thoughts or feelings of insecurity, fear, and concern over a relative lack of possessions or safety.

Jealousy can consist of one or more emotions, such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness or disgust.

It is also what we feel when we compete with someone and think they’re doing better than us.

The famous psychoanalyst, Sigmund Freud, said it is human to experience jealousy when a third party threatens an important relationship. He believed it would be abnormal not to experience jealousy under such circumstances.

When women see another party getting too close to their husbands, they go on the attack. If not, one has to start asking questions. Isn’t it a compliment to the man and a sign of the woman’s love when they do that?

In that sense, jealousy is not negative and also not, as the definition says, anger or disgust. It’s almost like a defence mechanism for the relationship, protecting it when danger threatens.

In a way, the Holy Spirit is also like that. The Holy Spirit also attacks, so to speak, when the relationship between God and us is in danger. When something takes up our attention and pulls us away from God, the defence mechanism pops up and He begins to defend what is His.

The Passion translation explains it really well: ⁵Does the Scripture mean nothing to you that says, “The Spirit that God breathed into our hearts is a jealous Lover who intensely desires to have more and more of us”?

The Holy Spirit is jealous of our time. He doesn’t want us to put Him somewhere in the corner of our lives and just nod our heads when we walk past Him now and then. No, He wants a large portion of our time.

Yes, we receive the Holy Spirit when we accept Jesus as our Saviour, that’s when God breathes His Spirit into us. The question now is, how many rooms of your house do you invite Him to?

Do you at first keep the braai room door closed to Him? Is there a “no entry” sign in your TV room? Do you only allow Him into certain rooms of your life and not into others?

You see, this is where the jealousy comes in. The Holy Spirit is jealous of the closed doors, because He knows that your time is stolen in there. The defence mechanism kicks in and begins to defend and protect the relationship.

The Holy Spirit, says the Word, is a jealous lover and seeks more and more of you. More of your time, more of your love, more of what you do. Just ask Him to help you surrender. He knows how to do that.

Scripture
James 4:1-6

Reflection
Where else do you need to open rooms for the Holy Spirit?
What should you do differently, so that the Holy Spirit does not become jealous of your relationship?
Who should you share this one with?

Prayer
Holy Spirit, I still need to open the doors of a few rooms. I struggle and I’m scared and, yes, also ashamed. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.