It brings me great joy to watch young love. The two young people in love are in each other’s space bubbles all the time. Sometimes I wonder if my son still knows that this is his parents’ house and not just a pit stop for clean clothes and pocket money. 

It also brings me great joy to be involved with young couples who want to get married. They sit close together on the sofa and hold hands. They are all too willing to learn and pay attention to the areas of work the programme has identified. 

It’s such a privilege for me to bring God’s Word at the wedding where the two promise to be faithful to each other. Their eyes sparkle and their speeches are filled with promises to serve each other through thick and thin. 

Then it’s not fun for me to see how this beautiful couple’s wheels fall off as soon as life gets too busy, and the children increasingly demand attention. Yes, I know there are marriages where one party constantly messes up and abuses the other one. If the person doesn’t stop doing these wrong things, the other one will highly likely break out of these unsafe walls. 

Where does the first crack show up? I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. It’s so important. When a couple arrived at my father’s consulting room, his first question to them was: “Do you still pray together?” 

When a couple regularly prays together, it’s not so easy to fight. When you invite God and the Holy Spirit into your marriage daily through prayer, it’s easier to have gentle words for each other, even if the weather is cloudy. 

It also is important to serve each other. Please note – each other. 1The same goes for you wives (husbands): Be good wives (husbands) to your husbands (wives), responsive to their needs. The Amplified Bible talks about submissive.  

Wife and husband must submit to each other. There are certain sections of the house that I hand over to my wife because she is simply better at them. She calls the shots there and I accept it with love. 

There are other parts where I do better, and she accepts that I’m in control there. We must both do our part in our home and our marriage because this ensures a happy life. 

When you decide to get married, you sacrifice a part of yourself. The “I want” is replaced with “we want”. What is important to me changes to what is important to us. But it seems to me that the longer a person is married, the more the “we” is moved to the background and the “I” suddenly stands up. 

Marriage is not give and take. You give a little and I don’t give a little. No, marriage is to give and give and give. If you receive something back, it’s a bonus. Let’s make time for each other and see where we can improve to be a good spouse. Let’s see where we can meet each other’s expectations. Let’s live our lives in a way that showcases the joy and teamwork of a healthy marriage. 

Scripture
1 Peter 3:1-7 

Reflection
Where are there snags in your marriage?
What do you have to work on?
How can you serve each other better? 

Prayer
Father, thank you for my marriage. I’m committed to work on some aspects of our relationship. Please give me more wisdom and strengthen our love for each other. Amen.