I received an email from a Crossroad reader. Karel (not his real name) feels hopeless. He simply can’t take it anymore. The disrespect from kids. He writes:

I am writing this e-mail from my hospital bed. I talked to a psychologist yesterday, because I can’t take it anymore – the storms are raging and I feel powerless. Sometimes I feel like jumping, because then the storms will end. I’m exhausted, I don’t want to fight. I hate conflict and arguing. I pray and pray and pray …

He’s rude to his mother and to me. He doesn’t respect us at all.

If we want to talk to him about something, he gets up, slams doors, locks himself in, or jumps into my car and drives off like the devil – then everyone has to shut up and be “scared” when he comes back.

That’s what disrespect does. It messes everything up. Therefore, the father cannot help but turn to God for help.

“Lord, help me with my child. He’s going to ruin my marriage and cause my death. I’m praying because I can’t hold on to the side of that little boat anymore – I’ve already fallen out. My strength is running out. I really feel like letting go, because then I will be free from everyone and everything.”

The son doesn’t know this verse: ¹⁷Treat everyone you meet with dignity.

Fortunately, there is another side as well. A few years ago, I told the story of me and my children sitting under the caravan’s canopy when I asked them what made a friendship blossom. Their answer:

Stay in touch, talk to each other and listen to each other. Doing things with friends and having fun. You have to care about them. You have to understand the other one, give a piece of yourself, and be sensitive to each other’s needs.

My youngest snuck out of the caravan and added:

You must respect and love them.

Respect pops up everywhere. To build a healthy relationship, all parties must respect each other. If respect falls out of the bus, it does great damage and tears people apart.

It is said that respect must be earned. If your actions are right and in line with everyday expectations, you deserve respect. Then it’s easy for other people to respect you.

The problem comes when people don’t treat you with respect. Should you then also treat them with disrespect?

The passage says that we should treat all people with whom we come in contact with courtesy and manners. In other words, we must treat them with respect. Should Karel still treat his son well, even if his actions show disrespect?

I suspect this is what God expects of us: To treat all people we meet with respect. Not easy, but let’s try. Maybe some of our respect will rub off on them.

Scripture
1 Peter 2:13-17

Reflection
Where have you treated people without respect?
Where have people treated you disrespectfully?
How can you also treat these people with respect?

Prayer
Father, I know I should treat all people with respect, but it’s not that easy. Please help me to do as Jesus did. Amen.