²⁰God’s righteousness doesn’t grow from human anger. And also, not from going to bed angry. Maybe we should all learn from Rina:

“Also, don’t go to bed while you’re still angry with someone.”

I can write a book about this phrase, not because I think I can or even like writing, but because I know what it is not to go to bed angry while you’re still angry with someone. I had a bitter and painful experience that will make me think twice for the rest of my life.

My dad was a strict, but a dear person, loved in the community, loved in the church. My dad had one rule: I had to sleep at home. I was only allowed to sleep over at my grandmother with my cousin on very special occasions.

One evening I was very daring, and a friend and I made a very “clever” plan for me to go on a sleepover with her at her grandparents’ house. Well, our “clever” plan backfired, as they say, and Dad came and fetched me.

My father was so angry! I was very angry! All the way home, I told my dad, who I miss so much to this day, how unfair he was being, how much I hated him, how I wished he wasn’t my dad …

My dear, precious dad didn’t say much. I went to bed angry.

I thought I was dreaming when I heard my mom’s terrifying screams from the back room. My older sister got into bed with me and said we had to pray, because Daddy had had a heart attack. The ambulance’s wailing sirens broke into my childish prayers and nothing made any sense.

I tried my best to fall asleep again, so that everything could be like before and I could believe it was untrue, just a horrifying nightmare. But it wasn’t a dream.

Within what felt like minutes my sister told me, “Dad is dead”. And I had gone to bed angry and could never say that I’m sorry.

Rina’s true story is like being hit by a bucket of ice-cold water. I am so grateful that she had opened up her heart, because it taught me a lot. It made me once again take a stand against getting angry and going to bed angry.

A stand that says clearly: Let go of anger. Be the least. There are things that are worth much more. Rather concentrate on what is good and beautiful in others than on crooked words.

May our Father through His Spirit help us to stop anger before it can take hold of us.

Scripture
James 1:19-27

Reflection
What makes you angry?
How can you channel the angry emotion differently?
Should God help you?

Prayer
Father, please help me here. Sometimes I slip up too and then I don’t want to stop fighting. I know it’s wrong. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.